Friday, February 19, 2016



Half Star

Mini Review:

This movie is like the tired xerox of a xerox of a xerox of a xerox of a xerox of a xerox copy of  First Daughter/Chasing Liberty/Hero/Hero Again/Hero Yet Again. It tries hard to humor the audience and you end up facepalming more than falling in Ishq for any moment of time.

Main Review:

'See this photograph, mere aka!' Terrorist Henchman gives photo to bearded Terrorist Boss reclining on a rock.
'Hmmm... She could make a great wife but I'm not able...' Terrorist Boss confesses..

'She's not wife, but daughter of Indian Prime Minister, mere akaa! We will kidnap her and India will meet our demands.' 

They all laugh and Thomson and Thompson with blackfaces (YES! SO RACIST YOU WANT TO LEAVE THE THEATRE) set out to kidnap the First Daughter.

First daughter Pout-A-Lot wears skimpy clothes and opens the door without any clothes. It's meant to be cute. If she were 5 years old. Yes. Not when you're 18.

The predictable happens. She is rescued by presentable lad on motorbike, and chased by security team of old Javed Jafferi and strange Lisa Ray (one cannot run to save his life, and the other wears impossible clothes and shoes (so does not run) and a pained expression throughout the film.

A girls falls in love with the guy who kisses her, and then insists it is janam janam ka saath. The lad who has never been exposed to the Sun suddenly begins to take his shirt off and has an attack of the conscience and sleeps on the floor asking the girl to take the bed. 

Before you finish groaning, you wonder from where did they get the clothes? They're at Sardarji's home and neither he nor his wife are the right size... they also camp with people and run off from the camp with a backpack. Wait a minute! Did they not have a thing when they left home?

You have stopped caring but then the funniest fight scene ensues: Small Terrorist Boss (Zakir Hussain) shows up to get beaten up by lad in the face. Again and again and again. But his indestructible glasses remain unharmed. 

Do you care if the Prime Minister approves all this Ishq In the Line Of Duty? No one cares. You only wish the young people would take acting lessons instead of pouting, wearing skimpy clothes, shedding shirts, wearing transparent shirts, speaking incoherently in strange accents and doing the Shah Rukh arm spread in the name of love... 

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