Friday, January 03, 2014


no star

Kuch Bhi Karvalo Humor Ke Naam Pe

Mini Review:

This very first film of the year challenges you at every step, daring you to find something good in the two hour long nonsense. Barring Four jokes that actually make you smile, this film offers nothing, nothing, nothing.

Main Review:

Why do smart, funny actors like Arshad Warsi believe that they are doing something good by acting in asinine nonsense in the name of comedy? He’s so badly shortchanged by this attempt at comedy that you come away wishing him real friends and more brains. The entire cast comes across as a desperate ‘let’s make some money and go home, film be damned’ kind of people. The damage done to cinema as a whole does not count.

But if the film were a challenge to reviewers, then it presents a huge mountain to climb. A thorny mountain that pokes fun at everything logical. This would be a challenge to CID fans even. This movie has proof how drunken (on praise from friends) joke writers can churn out a script that could possibly evince a groan among friends but on screen it is nothing more than ‘Was that supposed to be funny?’ in the audience's head.

I found myself handcuffed to my seat by this self appointed mission: how many times will they milk the joke in the title of the film.

To give them credit, it is used only three times in the film, and the punchline is funniest when Ranjeet in red pants (or is it Shakti Kapoor as a ‘bad man’) says, ‘Aaj kuch nahi karvana.’

As I said there are four jokes.

The heroine’s name is Shantipriya. When the bad guys kidnap her they scrawl a message on the wall: If you want Shanti call 98xxxxx . The hero sees the message and says: These days the babajis will sell peace anywhere..

The heroine’s baby brother turns blue because it’s been pummelled and thrown out of the window (don’t ask), and the Hero looks at the ugly blue baby, and says, ‘Jaadu’

Javed Jaffrey talking to himself in multiple voices says: Your name should have been Critic Roshan!

And last but not the least,

The villain, whose name is a bit like Voldemort (whosoever says it dies), asks in triumph, ‘What’s my name? What’s my name?’ and then the three people standing on top of a jeep sing, ‘My name is Carlos’ in the tune of ‘My name is Sheila’

You laugh because you are not expecting anything sharp in the nonsense that is going on in the movie: A dark-skinned fat marathi guy in an afro hair falls in love with… No, no, no… I shall not torture you with a story that goes everywhere and nowhere.

Suffice it to say that you will see Javed Jaffrey in a dress (again!), a familiar cast that is happy to slap each other, stars of yesteryear make asses of themselves. Soha Ali Khan and Arshad Warsi making yet another terrible choice…

I pity the songwriter, because the two songs have very clever stand up funny poetry style lyrics that just did not get translated well on screen.

You come away from the theater feeling like you stepped into dog poo. As the first film of the year, Joe Bhi Carvahlo sets a very low benchmark. Anything else would just be a step up. Cheers!

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