Friday, February 23, 2018

Review: WELCOME TO NEW YORK


This film should be sent up the river!
And I hope they drown it before it reaches Sing Sing.

ZERO stars

Mini Review:

When you watch award shows, you know the stars in the
audience are cheering and clapping for something else. They
use the footage from the IIFA show and include it on terrible
green screens and edits to make a terrible copy of Mel Brooks
hit film The Producers. This film fails to extract even half a
guffaw, and proves that Karan Johar is better off behind the
camera and not in the front of it.

Main Review:

I 💓 KJo, But I love cinema more

Don’t get me wrong, I love Koffee With Karan, bad spelling and
all. He’s witty and clever and makes his guests talk. But in this
film, he’s intolerable. He’s a parody of everything bad. And my
sensibilities were hurt when he claims in the film that the red
blazer he’s wearing is ‘2017 December Prada’. The film is so
terrible, you google and confirm that Prada did not have
anything remotely red in their fall-winter collection, unless it was
a messenger bag. The K-Jo fan inside me died.

IIFA Murdabad!

So they take the story from The Producers, and Lara Dutta
wants to ruin the IIFA New York because she’s denied a
promotion. She runs a ‘talent contest’ and decides to choose
the worst of the worst. We could give the film a glimmer of a star
because they do not show us the different participants showing
their talent. Small mercies. But the glimmer dies with the hamming
from everyone. Boman Irani, Karan Johar, Sonakshi Sinha,
Diljeet Dosanjh… everyone should be hung and salted for Bigas
Luna’s Jamon Jamon part two. Except that everyone who sat
through this travesty should be allowed to watch shirtless
Javier Bardem standing in front of these ‘stars’ hung by great big
ham hooks.















Sonakshi Sinha overdoes the 'faint upon seeing Salman Khan'
bit, but it is not awful to watch. It's awful that she has to be a
Gujju girl and they have to add fafda and Modiji and 'Gujarat is
best' in everything she says. Ugh!

Sad to see Riteish Deshmukh be a part of this despite having
made Ek Villain, Lai Bhari and Faster Fene. As Marathi mums
will say, ‘Why, Riteish, why?’

Diljit Dosanjh is perfect example of a girl crush shattering.
He was brilliant in Udta Punjab and Phillauri. And now this? He’s
neither fully village bumpkin, nor is he a movie buff. He’s butter
chicken with butter gone rancid. What a let down the lure
of ‘big movies’ can be!

They made the film in 3D as well!

The movie itself is terribly made. It uses footage from the IIFA
awards, showing how stars arrive and are seated and are
cheering for something that’s happening on stage. It’s so terribly
inserted, even lay people in the audience can see clearly that
it is not shot for the film. And if IIFA paid money to promote
their brand, the audience will prove that content, not footage
is king.

Am sure Karan Johar’s cell phone has smarter and
more interesting video footage than this awful, awful film.


(this review appears on nowrunning dot com )

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