Friday, February 16, 2018


Ai Yai Yaar! Yeh Film Kab Khatam Hogi?!

2 stars

Mini Review:

An Indian Army Covert Unit has gone rogue and threatens to
expose Army-Politicians-Arms Dealer nexus, thereby exposing
his own unit. The Covert Unit head goes undercover to catch him
before he sells out. The goings on seem interesting enough and
you know patriotism will win, but it takes almost three hours for
this supposed thriller to unfold. If it weren’t for Manoj Bajpayee,
this tedious thriller would have been even duller than it is.


Major Jay Bakshi is an important part of the special covert unit
called Data & Systems Diagnostics or DSD. Mid-surveillance,
he’s gone missing, and they’re looking for him. His Unit chief
Col. Abhay Singh (Manoj Bajpayee, the best thing about this
movie) goes AWOL after shutting down the regular offices and
moving them to a hangar and goes off in search of Jay.

Jay, the Intelligence Officer (who does not know how to hack into
a computer, seriously?!) of course has fallen in love with a girl
who teaches him how to hack (Rakul Preet Singh, rather
unimpressive). And you’re groaning into the multiplex coffee.
Then groan some more when you realise that his ‘hacking’ is
then never really utilised and he’s only listening in to
bugged recordings.

However, you’re on the side of the sharp-mustachioed
Colonel Abhay who is righteously angry about being betrayed.
Jay Bakshi (played by Sidharth Malhotra, who has fewer
expressions than John Abraham) and his girl are in London
now. So is Abhay. Abhay meets Anupam Kher who plays
Tariq Sahab, a player who knows everything about everything.
They need not have wasted Anupam Kher’s talent at such a
poorly written role (he has to send texts to Abhay organising
‘things’). The same goes for the big bad guy Mukesh Kapoor
who stands around holograms of guns to prove he is the big
gun runner doing deals with everyone. Why did they need
Adil Hussain? Anyone could be that guy.

But you like Manoj Bajpayee, so you watch. A few more
groanworthy, and eminently editable flashbacks happen where
Jay reminisces about the valor or Abhay Sir and we see how
cool Indian Army guys are and why Jay wants to be like
Abhay Sir. The hacker girlfriend is reduced to someone making
coffee for Jay. You know by now, or begin to suspect that Jay
and Abhay are on the same side. But Abhay sir telling all the
bad guys, kill Jay is just a ploy because Jay has learnt all the
techniques from Abhay sir only!

There’s also Naseeruddin Shah practically locked up in a hotel
room who has enough proof to blackmail to the Arms dealer in
India (Ex Army general Gurinder Singh played quite nicely by
Kumud Mishra). Why he needlessly cackles is a directorial
debacle, but hey, it’s Naseer-ji! Who can tell him to keep it
understated like he did in A Wednesday?
It takes almost three hours to get to the point. And by then you
know Jay and Abhay will be the best chaps in the Army. You
wish someone would teach Indian directors to tell their stories
simply and quickly. They’d be so much more thrilling.    

(this review appears on )

No comments: